“It is not impermanence that makes us suffer.  What makes us suffer is wanting things to be permanent when they are not.” — Thich Naht Hanh

A couple of weeks ago, I snapped this photo of the hornet nest in the woods because I noticed it was getting a little shabby.  I suspect the cooler temps prevent the hornets from tending to their nest and that is the reason for the disrepair.  I didn’t observe any hornets around the nest.  Since this photo was taken, we’ve had a fair amount of rain so I haven’t ventured through the mud and leaves to further observe the condition of the hornet nest.

I eagerly watched the progress of the buzzy builders through the summer.  Layer upon layer of hornet saliva and wood fiber meticulously applied as the heart-shaped nest developed.  They were doing what hornets do – without worry, stress, or concern for the future.  They simply existed in the moment. They were what they were meant to be and do.

And at the end of summer, all their work and effort began to disintegrate and fade.  It caused me to stop and reflect on the impermanence of things.  It is the onion of a life truth of which I continue to peel layer after layer.  Things wear out and do not last forever.  Seasons end. Relationships end. Jobs are lost. Friends move away. Pets die. Loved ones die. Nothing lasts forever. “This too shall pass.” “Remember, that you are dust and to dust you shall return.”

No, we won’t last forever.  We will wear out and die.  We will experience friends and loved ones wearing out and dying as well.  BUT I believe our Matter will not be destroyed.  I’m not completely sure about this.  I may be completely wrong. I believe our matter converts to energy.  Perhaps that is what we mean by the Soul, the Essence, the Spirit.  I believe our Life-Force continues after our body has become raggedy and then stopped functioning.  That matter “goes” somewhere.  It just doesn’t cease to be or does it?  Some believe at some designated time in the future, our bodies will be resurrected.  I’d like to think that the future time is not constrained by our concept of time and so this resurrection happens when our body transforms into energy which then expands into the Universe and returns to star-dust. I think we go home to the Universe.  I think we are “resurrected” to our cosmic home. We go back to being star dust.  I don’t know about you but I plan on making it to full stardom! Yea, I’m gonna be a star!  I wish churches would change that prayer usually said on Ash Wednesday during the distribution of ashes to something like “remember that you are STAR dust and you shall return to STAR dust”.

Well, at least that is how I see it.  That’s kinda “out there” isn’t it.  It helps me to appreciate the tireless, busy work of a colony of hornets building a nest all summer only to see it become a raggedy mess in the fall.  I am sad because I’ve known the “wow” of watching their work all summer. The ending and dissolving of the nest is as much a part of the cycle as the first crepe paper walls in early summer.  It’s that yin/yang thing. Embracing and holding the “both/and” and loving the tension it creates.  We suffer because we want things to stay the same, to remain permanent.  Thanks to impermanence, though, there are endless possibilities.  Anything is possible because nothing stays the same. The only constant in the Universe is change – and that is a good thing!

But it’s normal, natural and necessary to experience feelings of sadness, loss, or grief when things end. Should we avoid building, creating, and being in relationship because the cold winds might end what we’ve created? No.  Should we avoid Love because people die or relationships end and our hearts get broken? No.  All of those experiences can be transmuted and transformed into Grace.

I try to live in the present moment.  Sometimes I do okay and sometimes not so much.  Sometimes I worry too much or wish things were different.  And sometimes I’m stopped in my tracks in the woods as I observe hornets building a papery home without a care in the world. I join them in that moment. Sometimes the impermanence of things causes a little sadness.  Sometimes I realize I will be a Star one day! Nuttin’ lasts forever.

For your reflection: What helps you to stay present in the present moment? How does focusing on your breathing help you to dwell in the here and now? How to you feel when you hear “nothing lasts forever”? 

Are you challenged by limitations in your life? How do you pray with the feelings of loss of something you once had? What gives you a “wow”? How do you hold the tensions of “wow” and sadness?

How do your views about life, death, resurrection, expansion into the Universe, life after death, etc. shape your spirituality? Are you able to appreciate a belief you don’t share?

If you could create a ritual symbolizing your letting go of something you feel should last forever, what would that ritual look like?

Blessings all,

Christy

 

(This blog is not intended to serve as individual spiritual direction. Spiritual direction or companioning is typically done in a face to face confidential setting. If you would like to explore one on one spiritual direction or your faith community would like to experience group spiritual direction, please contact me. I would be more than happy to set up a time to talk with you. In the meantime, my hope is that the photos and the blog serve as a pause in your day, food for thought or just a reminder to breathe in and breathe out all that is holy and good. The Divine Milieu is all around us. Thank you all for your prayers and support.)

 

 

 

I had the honor and pleasure of attending a meeting of hospital and hospice chaplains in my area earlier this week where I had an opportunity to listen to folks who to the work of ministering to our sick and dying in our greater community.  They were asked to reflect on several questions designed to get them to look at how they reflect, refresh and thrive in doing the work they do which in my opinion takes a very special breed to do.  I was invited along with several others who have been a part of a ministry education program for people interested in providing volunteer hospital pastoral care ministry.

We were challenged to ask ourselves several questions I’ve paraphrased here.  How do you take time to reflect? What do you do to facilitate reflection? As part of reflecting ask yourself why do you continue to do what you do? Why are you here as a hospital or hospice chaplain?  What is live giving in your work, play and personal time?  What are the values which allow you to do what you do? What is your purpose, your passion, your calling?  What accomplishments, events, or areas of growth in the last 12 months fill you with gratitude and self affirmation?

Secondly, how do you create time to refresh?  What is the thing that keeps you grounded which enables you to show up each and every day to do the work you do?  How do you cultivate time for life giving activities, for reflection, and for family?  What is the one thing you could do over the next 6 months that would have a significant positive impact on your life, your well being, and your spiritual life?

Thirdly, how do you take time to thrive?  What are a few things, tangible or intangible, large or small you would be thrilled to achieve over the next six months?  How do you cultivate resiliency in yourself?  How do you engage in your life and your work with purpose and commitment? How are you able to stay true to your authentic self and engage with purpose and connectivity to your calling, ministry or mission?  And my favorite question – how do you stay connected to your internal GPS?

GPS is a global positioning system which uses satellites to beam information about our locations to a GPS or phone.  It guides us by providing instructions to turn, change directions, make u-turns, shows us routes to travel, and when we find ourselves completely off track, recalculates based on our current position.  When the facilitator asked this question I had one of those “aha” moments.  I believe we all have an internal something which guides us and if we pay close attention we are able to navigate the twists and turns and detours of our lives.

How we stay connected to that internal guide was the question of the day for me.  Through meditation, prayer, reading scripture and the writings of spiritual writers I connect to my inner guidance system.  I also remain connected when I see nature through the lens of my camera and create a slice of time in a well thought out shot.  I am connected when I blog or write in my journal or collage with images or color mandalas.  Purposely being aware, being mindful of moments is another way I connect to that internal guide.  Last but certainly not least, I connect to my own internal guide with help from trusted spiritual companions, a peer group, and a spiritual community which encourage me and give me life.

How do you stay connected to your GPS? How do you thrive? What gives you life? What do you think are the qualities of a thriver vs. a survivor?  What does it feel like to survive? What does it feel like to thrive? Are you surviving or thriving?

I encourage you to spend some time reflecting on these questions and others which may arise. You may want to reflect on these questions over several days.  Journaling your responses will give you an opportunity to revisit them later.

Finally, I would be honored to companion you on your journey if that is something you desire.  I believe we are meant for so much more than simply surviving this life.  We are meant to thrive.

Thank you for reading and for your prayers and good vibrations. May you be filled with passion, compassion, humor and a little bit o’ style! Namaste.

Blessings,

Christy

P.S. Several years ago, I was introduced to the music of Casting Crowns, a Christian Rock group and discovered several songs which resonated with me.  One is titled “Thrive”.  You can listen and watch the video here Casting Crowns “Thrive” Live (I also recommend “Just Be Held” from the same album.)   

Tell me the facts and I’ll learn. Tell me the truth and I’ll believe. But tell me a story and it will live in heart forever.” – Native American Proverb

I attended a workshop about story telling sponsored by Spiritual Director’s International this past week in St. Paul, MN.  The presenter and facilitator was Diane M. Millis. (Discover Diane at http://www.journeyconversations.org/who-we-are/project-partners/) Diane enabled us to dig into our own stories and discover how they impact our spirituality.  I had been feeling for several weeks that I needed some retreat time and the Spirit provided.

I wish I could recreate what I experienced for all of you.  I really enjoyed meeting other spiritual directors and spiritual companions from across the country and getting to know them.  In addition, I couldn’t ask for a better traveling companion than Sister Marj. The hospitality of St. Catherine’s University of St. Paul was warm and generous.  Our lodgings with the Sisters of St. Joseph of Carondelet were simple and cozy.  And to top off the few days, I was able to reconnect with old friends who had relocated to the St. Paul area.  All in all, it was a much needed reflection time, a blessing to meet new friends and reconnect with old ones.

What did I learn? How did I evolve from the experience?  To be honest, I am still processing and playing with all of the ideas and images and the feelings.  It has been some time that a workshop has fed my intellect and my heart.  It was part graduate level class in that it was packed with research data and part retreat because the process invited us to dig under and into our own stories.  I had anticipated more of a “how to” help those I companion with look at their stories and dig under them to experience the spirituality within them.  Sometimes it is best to experience the process so we can appreciate how challenging that might be for those with whom we companion.

What did I learn?   I learned that the spirituality of some of our stories are fogging but they continue to burn clear like light through the fog.  When we revisit an old story and tell it a new way with new eyes and new vision it is redeemed and transformed.  Rewriting my story in the third person or as a fairy tale helped me to see old stories with a bit more objectivity.  I no longer attached my ego to the story as Truth but saw truths within it each story.   By Grace, I saw my stories differently.  By Grace, I flipped the script on a story or two. Where I was lost once in a story, by Grace, I was now found.

For your reflection:  How might you rewrite you stories? What needs Grace? How will you invite Grace into your stories? Find a photograph or picture that speaks to a part of your story? What stories hold you? What stories do you hold? What stories reveal you being held?

Blessings,

Christy

(This blog is not intended to serve as individual spiritual direction. Spiritual direction or companioning is typically done in a face to face confidential setting.  If you would like to explore one on one spiritual companioning or your faith community would like to experience group spiritual direction, please contact me. I would be more than happy to talk with you.  In the meantime, my hope is that the photos and blog serve as a pause in your day, food for thought or just a reminder to breathe in and breathe out all that is holy and good. The Divine Milieu is all around us.  Thank you all for your prayers and support.)

 

 

“When we take the one seat on our meditation cushion we become our own monastery. We create the compassionate space that allows for the arising of all things: sorrows, loneliness, shame, desire, regret, frustration, happiness.” —Jack Kornfield, “Take The One Seat”

Consider how you can create a compassionate meditation or prayer space – what Jack Kornfield, Buddhist practitioner and writer of numerous books on Buddhism calls, your own monastery. It is within a quiet, contemplative and compassionate space that allows you to lean into your feelings especially the ones we think of as “negative”.  It also allows you the space and time to disentangle from feelings and simply observe them.

The same contemplative monastery on the cushion allows for the space to send out compassion to our communities and our world.  I don’t think I need to state the obvious about the rampant lack of basic civility in our society at the moment. I have practiced my own form of loving-kindness meditation and share it here.

The Practice:

Begin by sitting comfortably in a chair or on a meditation cushion in stillness and uprightness.  Sit quietly breathing normally. Notice your breath.

As you breath in, say in your mind. “May I be filled with loving kindness” and on the exhale “May I be well.”

On the next in-breath “May I be at peace and at ease” followed by the out breath “May I be happy”.

Do this several times. Rest in the calmness. Focus on the breathe.  Where there is any anxiety, shame, loneliness, unhappiness, etc. continue to breath in and out saying the meditation. When thoughts and stories pop up in your mind – and they will – acknowledge them and let them drift by.

After a while choose someone or your community and change the wording from May I be filled with loving kindness to May he/she/they be filled with loving kindness and so on. You may go on to meditate for your state, your country and finally including the world and then the universe.  You may feel you want to breathe in loving kindness for yourself for weeks or months before moving on to an individual or community.

Through all of the practice allow yourself to be relaxed and at ease. Allow thoughts to float by and focus on breathing in and out. Let go of the “story”, the narratives, the thoughts and feelings and simply float along the breath.

You can also use a mantra like The Centering Prayer following the breath in and out, a piece of scripture or a psalm, the Jesus Prayer or simply a word like “peace”.  I have “breathed” the Peace Prayer as a practice.  Recently, I breathed the refrain from a song composed during a spiritual director’s workshop with Carrie Newcomer “it’s ordinary, extraordinary.  It’s a true soul story and it’s holy.  It is holy.”

I’m here to support you in the creation of your own monastery and your seat of compassion and would be happy to talk with you about your journey.  Please feel free to email or call me.

In the meantime, Namaste, peace and all good, and blessings,

Christy

Last week I attended an all day workshop for spiritual directors in which singer/songwriter Carrie Newcomer facilitated.   If you haven’t heard this incredibly talented folk singer you simply must! I was introduced to her music a couple of years ago by my spiritual director (more on that later) so I felt I was in for a real treat.

Whenever I set aside time for growth and learning, I am always blessed.   Carrie’s workshop “Our Lives as Sacred Story” delivered in abundance! We were asked to write in answer to a prompt for about 10 minutes and then share in dyads both of which are a little challenging for me.  Time limits on writing? Share with another person? Yikes! Breathe in, breathe out, let it go – phew! Blessed be! My sharing partner was not a stranger but one of my fellow graduates from the Benedict Inn Spiritual Directors Internship and someone I’ve learned to trust with some of my “stuff” so my shared emotions did not frighten her no hers scare me off.  Spiritual grace shared in abundance.

After lunch, we reconvened and Carrie took the entire group through a process in which we collectively wrote a song.  Yes, a group of spiritual directors, Carrie Newcomer and  The Spirit wrote a song together.  I love the words of the chorus:

“It’s ordinary, extraordinary. It’s a true soul story. And it’s holy, it is holy”

I found myself singing the chorus at various moments this week.  The juxtaposition of ordinary things like a stranger’s kindness or a smile with the majesty and wonder of Niagara Falls brought it forth.  Or walking into the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown, NY, which felt like walking into a sacred place among the extraordinary men who’s bronze plaques grace the walls, while wearing my ordinary high school baseball team shirt and hat of my favorite team (and my mother’s).

It is holy and it is a soul story. Visiting the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown, NY is a mix of vacation with my ever patient spouse, crossing a thing off my bucket list and grieving my mother’s death.  I thought a visit to Niagara Falls on the way to Cooperstown was a great way to avoid driving 10 or 11 hours in one day. I thought we’d walk to the park overlooking part of the falls, snap a few photos and call it a day.  We did much more and immersed ourself in the whole experience and visited the Cave of the Winds, rode the Maids of the Mist boat, visited Goat Island and saw the giant whirlpool. An extraordinary experience!

Cooperstown. The Baseball Hall of Fame. Part museum.  Part holy place honoring the mortal men who did extraordinary things playing a child’s game with a round ball measuring only 9 1/4 inches in circumference and weighing between 5 and 5 1/4 ounces, and a round piece of wood less than 42 inches in length, no more than 2.75 inches round and weighing between 33 and 36 ounces on a field shaped like a diamond where the distance between bases is 90 feet.  It is the place of dreams for players and fans alike.

I had many reasons for journeying to Cooperstown.  There is certainly a “wow” factor to walking into the room of plaques of inductees.  Images of players, managers, commissioners, broadcasters, and umpires from the Major leagues and Negro leagues are cast in bronze containing 90 words about their career accomplishments.  As of January 2018, there were 323 inductees in the HOF.  Five more players made up the induction class of July 2018.  Yep – there’s the WOW factor.

Then there is the connection with my mother who taught me to throw a baseball when I was a wee one, introduced me to Pete Rose at Crosley Field, and who took me to Cincinnati Reds baseball games including the opening day game in 1974 when Hank Aaron tied Babe Ruth’s home run record among other things.  She died on a the evening after listening on the radio to her favorite high school baseball team play in the State Championship game.  For her, the season had ended and it was time to tarp the field and go home.  I knew she and my dad went to Cooperstown when Milwaukee Brave third basemen, Eddie Matthews was inducted in 1978.  I wanted to go there too, to affirm the connection with my mother and with baseball.

I will admit it was a little emotional.  There were times when I felt my throat tighten and my eyes held some tears almost ready to cascade like the falls at Niagara but as Tom Hanks’ character in A League of Their Own and is often quoted “there’s no crying in baseball”. So, no crying in the Hall of Fame! My journey to Cooperstown is part of my soul story. And it’s holy.  It. Is. Holy. The tears not shed are holy. My ordinary and very extraordinary mother is holy.  It is my true soul story.

 

Reflections: Reflect on the ordinary and extraordinary in your life.  How is it holy? Are you able to see all of your life, the ordinary and extraordinary as holy? Why or why not?

Thank you for reading. Thank you for your support.  Please feel free to forward to friends and family.

Blessings one and all,

Christy

(I took all the photographs here with a Nikon 7500 using a 18-140 mm lens.)